July 6, 2017
18 Comments

One Day At A Time

Greetings from Babyland! It’s amazing how your life really does go from being all about you to being…well…very little about you. I know we’ll get some of that independence back as she builds up her own reserve but right now it’s Lola’s world and we are just living in it. Although it’s still the toughest thing I’ve ever done we are getting some of the sweetest smiles every day now and that actually does help a lot. I feel like one of the reasons it’s so hard at first is that you get very little back from Baby until they can start to communicate and engage with you a bit more (laughs, smiles, coos, etc.) so sometimes it can feel like you are on the hardest babysitting gig ever for a cute loaf of baloney until those developments kick in. She’s starting to be able to sit by herself a little bit more in a swing or on a blanket which is helpful. Still no longer than 5-10 min max but it’s a start from crying immediately every time you put her down. Girlfriend loves to be held!

                    Top/Shein, Bag/Shein, Shoes/Similar, Shorts/Similar, Sunnies/Similar
I posted on Instagram that it’s so hard to be kind to myself in this season of life and extend the necessary amount of grace, but I’m trying the best that I can. Sometimes that may mean buying myself my favorite flowers, painting my nails, taking a soak in the bathtub during a nap, splurging on a new clothing item that make me feel better about all the post-partum body changes (these jeans are my favorites right now and I’m awaiting these shoes anxiously), or just forgiving myself for snapping at Todd ten times an hour. I’m far from behaving how I want to all the time (extra shoutout to hormones here!) but it’s good to remember that it’s the overwhelming situational stress that’s behind those snaps and my real personality is still buried in there somewhere.

One thing that makes life a lot easier is using a carrier when I want to be hands-free. Ergobaby asked if I wanted to try their limited edition Keith Haring carrier and it has turned out to be a lifesaver. Todd and I both use it around the house as well as for outings to the park, coffee shops, etc. and I know I’ll use it a lot once I can muster the courage to go grocery shopping with Lola (that will be a big accomplishment for sure!). The whole thing is basically adjustable from every angle so it fits your body really well and the padded straps and weight distribution make it easy on your back too. I’m obsessed with this black and white Haring print and it goes with everything since I wear black and white 99% of the time anyways…

Our friend Rachel made us the sweetest pastel rainbow quilt (so cute!) and we’ve been using it and this adorable swan playmat for tummy time. She likes when you lie down next to her to keep her company… We also took her on her first big trip this past week to Pittsburgh to see my family and friends. We drove Todd to his Mutemath show in Columbus first so Lola got to be at her first concert with Daddy, but as you can see above, she was not in the mood for it or her baby headphone ear protection either. She was actually already extra fussy before the show and long after so I think she just wasn’t feeling well. We spent the majority of the show in the green room or walking the adjacent parking lot to try and calm her down- poor baby!! It will be a few months before she goes to her next one so maybe she’ll be in a better mood then. We also got to take her to the pool with my parents and grandma and that was so fun to see her in her little swimsuit and her reaction to the water. She likes her baths so I thought there was a good chance she would like it, and while she was a little skeptical, she lasted about 15 minutes before crying so I would call that a success! I actually just bought this inflatable pool for our yard to try swimming at home so I’m excited to try that with her too.

All and all, we are still adjusting to so many things but I’m trying to remember and store up all the sweet little moments that are a part of everyday as well. Even in the hardest times it’s good to remind myself that we are so lucky overall and babies don’t keep forever so I have to get in those fleeting moments while I can…

18 thoughts on “One Day At A Time

  1. Andrea

    I just wanted to say I really appreciate your honesty about life as a new Mom. I’m always glad to see your Instagram stories and posts because I feel like I can relate. I had a preemie back in January and we brought him home around the end of March and it’s been really tough. It’s true what they say, you can’t prepare yourself for parenthood. Being responsible for a tiny human changes your life in ways you could never imagine beforehand. Anyways, thanks again for your honesty. You and your little family have a unique situation but also know you’re not alone in struggling with newfound motherhood. You’re doing a great job and Lola is adorable (and yes, it’s amazing how one smile can melt away a whole days worth of fussiness!).

    Reply
    1. thebandwifeblog Post author

      Yes, it’s definitely a whole new world in a million ways! But it is getting better and better slowly so just hang in there!

      Laura 🙂

      Reply
  2. Jen

    ‘One day at at time’ is so apt for this phase of babydom. You got this, Mama! Continue taking care of yourself like you have been. A happy Mama helps to make a happy baby. 🙂 And remember, all the emotions are all normal!

    Reply
  3. Allison Fay

    Yes to ALL of this!! I kept thinking “when will this get easier? Or at least more fun?” It’s so much work at first, with very little reward, just like you said.

    And the hormones! We bought a new sectional when Roland was a newborn because when Brandon came home from work I had missed him SO much that I wanted to be able to sit right next to him. But our dog and our cat wanted to sit next to us too, and of course Roland was either in our arms or close by, and there just wasn’t enough room for all of us on our regular couch. One day I would be crying because I was so happy with our little family and the next I would be crying from cabin fever!

    Anyway, you are doing an awesome job. Baby wearing is the best!

    Reply
    1. thebandwifeblog Post author

      Ha ha, YES, everyone wants to sit together but there’s no room! And the hormones…good grief!!

      Laura 🙂

      Reply
  4. Sandy

    Becoming a mama is such an adjustment! It’s hard to believe that in the near future you will miss this sweet phase. It passes so quickly!

    Reply
  5. Trisha

    Oh man, Yes to all of this. It is so hard. I like that podcast- “The Longest Shortest Time” because that is the best way to phrase it. It goes by so fast but at the same time creeps along! But it is worth it. I’m tired just reading this! I have a 20 month old at home and she is so fun but they wear you out! You are doing a great job and just remember to be kind to yourself. The hormones are the worst. I am still breastfeeding and fear weaning will bring on all new hormone adjustments. Get some rest and just keep doing what you’re doing! You’re awesome and she looks just too sweet!

    Reply
    1. thebandwifeblog Post author

      Thanks Trisha! Sounds like you totally get it, glad to hear it’s more fun down the road!

      Laura 🙂

      Reply
  6. Katie

    I loved this post!!!! I love how honest you are about having a baby. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I have an 8 month old and it felt like forever when you are in the middle of a not so fun stage :/ but soon you will be saying I have to start planning a first birthday!! Thank you for making me feel like a normal mom!!!

    Reply
    1. thebandwifeblog Post author

      Yes, it’s so helpful to hear from other Moms, isn’t it?? I’m sure you’re doing great, hang in there!

      Laura 🙂

      Reply
  7. Airi

    Hey
    My baby just turned 5 weeks old and I can relate with you so much. I find it surprisingly tough to give away your…body and soul? That indeed it’s all about the baby and you’re constantly making sacrifices for her. She needs to be fed first, if you’re lucky you might find time to eat drink too. She needs to sleep, you’re just lucky if you get some too…
    It really helps me if my husband takes her to walks or stays home with her while I go for some alone time. That 30min a day provides so much clarity and helps me be a good calm mother.
    Also, think about this way, you’re physically still much more in control of your body than you were pregnant and throwing up everywhere.So yay for that! It can only get better from here!

    Airi

    Reply
  8. Lindsey

    You’re doing great! Moms worldwide can relate to the struggle. I remember the first time I took my 1st to the grocery store and I had so much anxiety! Hopefully you master the nursing in the carrier thing! It made life much easier being out!

    Reply
  9. Courtney

    I’m not a mom, but most of my friends are and I LOVE how honest you are about your transition into motherhood. There is so much pressure for it to be this perfect time and from watching my friends go through it, it most certainly ISN’T! You are (and were pre-baby!) a breath of fresh air in this great big internet world.

    Reply
  10. Stephanie

    Hey Mama,

    You are amazing! Thanks for all you share and for being being vulnerable in this post! I found you on instagram somehow as I was looking at pregnancy fashion and I was really impressed by your authenticity and spirit. Finding grace for myself now and preparing to have grace for my body postpartum is definitely a challenge, so I am thankful us mamas have a platform on the internet to share and encourage each other!
    I pray you are able to daily choose to have grace and compassion for yourself, you are doing great.

    xoxo

    Reply
  11. Kellie Roby

    She is so adorable!! And you are stunning! I’m sure being a new momma isn’t easy, but you make it look wonderful! I hope things keep getting easier for yall!

    Reply
  12. Adriana

    You look amazing for being a new mom! Take the time for yourself; I can only imagine how hard it is and hearing your story brings some of the realities of motherhood to light which I really appreciate it!

    Reply

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